The quietness of dawn is a precious time that can't be exchanged for anything else.

It is a golden moment to immerse oneself in one's own world and find inner peace and achieve individual growth before starting the day. Or rather, the time right after opening one's eyes can be said to be more precious than gold.

Personally, I don't want my dawn time to be disturbed by communication with others, especially through social network services (SNS) like KakaoTalk or Instagram. (Groups that I voluntarily created or participated in are exceptions.)

It is up to each individual to decide when to send messages, including KakaoTalk and other messages. It is possible to turn off the alarm at times when it is disturbing, so I don't care when you send messages. However, it is difficult to understand why you would ask someone to use SNS in the early morning, especially during the most precious time when one can enjoy solitude.

"My dawn time is completely messed up these days."

A, who enjoys the early morning like me, confided in me one day. A friend she had recently become acquainted with often contacted her in the early morning hours.

A was initially happy to hear from her friend. But gradually, the unnecessary chatter increased, and her friend began to lecture her, putting pressure on her. Eventually, A politely drew a line with her friend and tried to go back to spending her dawn time alone as before.

"It's sad that you don't contact me."

But not long ago, A was told that she was hurting her friend, and she had to make a phone call with her friend in the early morning.

That day, A wasted her time again with useless talk and couldn't even do half of what she had to do. Because of this situation, she said that even waking up in the early morning has become a pain.

Like this, we encounter moments in life when we are asked unreasonable demands by others. There are even people, like A's friend, who use emotional hurt to their advantage.

Just how much should we put up with unreasonable demands from others?

I have also met people who use emotional hurt to their advantage. At first, I felt sorry for them. It was because I felt uncomfortable about hurting them.

But We need to carefully consider whether a person who uses emotional hurt to make us do things we don't want to do is really someone who respects us, or someone we should care about.

A told her friend several times that she needed her own time. But her friend didn't listen to her at all. Is it possible for communication to be so one-sided? Can we even call that communication? And who compensates for the wasted early morning and concentration?

If you lose your time, you are the only one who loses out.

We have the right to protect our precious time. Even if it's not A's case, we have the right to refuse unreasonable demands from someone who uses emotional hurt to their advantage.

People who become sacrificial lambs always think about not hurting others. Using emotional hurt, the other person can manipulate you. They use it subtly whenever you try to act independently or escape their control. 95 percent of "emotional hurt" is not real hurt but material used for the victim strategy.

-Wayne Dyer, You Don't Have to Be Loved by Everyone

Is there anyone around you who makes unreasonable demands even though you say you don't want to? If so, it might be a sign that they are trying to manipulate you by using emotional hurt. They are trying to control you to their liking.

We need to learn how to refuse unreasonable demands in order to live well as ourselves.

Don't worry if they see you as someone who makes them feel sad and someone who is sensitive over nothing. It is right for us to make bad choices that make them sad for us. It's a much happier thing than making bad choices for ourselves.